Random Question

Is anyone else as terrified of Living Lohan and Denise Richards: It's Complicated as I am? I know that our civilization is approaching its twilight, and that people like me might be part of the problem. But I am fairly sure it is illegal to sell your children (hint hint Dina) and there is nothing really complicated about being idiotic, the only legitimate reason for marrying Charlie Sheen. If I think about these things too long I will have nightmares.

Supernatural (5): I Feel Cheated.

I need to say something right off the bat, because I can feel rant-mode welling up inside of me: except for the first minute and the last minute, I thought last night’s season finale was a good episode.

“The Road So Far” segment was disjointed and uninformative, almost as if they felt they needed to have it because both previous season finales did. It struck me as half-hearted and without a cohesive purpose.

The real problem was the ending. I am so disappointed and angry about the last minute that I am having trouble expressing myself. This was not a case of simply a generally weak episode; this was a good episode that they ruined! When I said yesterday “I would rather see Dean go to hell” I didn’t actually mean that I wanted to see it, as in experience a visual representation of it. But, okay, maybe this is just my personal preference: I think what we do not see is sometimes as frightening/important as what we do see, and that is a principle this show has previously employed to amazing affect. Be that as it may, can someone please explain to me why of all the possible interpretations of Hell (biblical, literary, cinematic, or newly imagined) this one looked like the opening credits of Spiderman? I am not going to say that anything would have been better than what they did, but I really really want to. There is just a point when concept and production value/capability are irreconcilable, and when that happens people should move on and come up with another idea. Otherwise you end up with what we got last night. The final image we have of Season Three, the one that will stick with us all summer until Season Four starts, was just silly looking.

This bugs me even more because it didn’t have to be this way; there are two obvious ways in which we know that the writers/producers/whomever responsible for this catastrophe know better.

The first is that this show knows so well how to kill off its principle/important characters. John’s death at the beginning of Season Two is rendered so perfectly not by witnessing his eternal torment, but by a coffee cup hitting the ground and seeing the shocked faces of his devastated children. Sam’s death in Part One of the Season Two finale is outstanding, with his brother holding him, his murderer running into the dark, and Bobby standing still not knowing if he should follow Jake or comfort Dean. Dean’s death has been the focal event of this season, and as such needed to be handled properly. There is no excuse for choosing to show (presumably) his soul chained up, floating in green, lightning-filled ether, screaming for Sam. Stupid, stupid decision.

The second way that we know they know better is the rest of the episode. Approaching his death Dean is able to see what the demons really look like behind the humans they possess (which is ridiculously cool, and I hope when he comes back from Hell he can still do this). Did they show us what he could see? NO! And that is the way it should be done. His reactions are more telling than CGI can be. Why recognize and respect the boundaries of what you should and should not show and them completely ignore those at the very last moment? Why?

If you are interested in an example of the way things like this (death and the afterlife) should be done, I suggest you watch the end of Season Two and the beginning of Season Three of Buffy. We never saw Angel in Hell, but the ramifications of his trip there were clear as crystal. Also see the end of Season Five and the beginning of Season Six, in which we did not see where Buffy went. Her friends presumed Hell, turned out she really went to Heaven, and we saw neither. Amazing.

Now I am just sad. Sad that a single minute has so overshadowed some really neat things. Like how funny Bobby is, and what a wonderful surrogate father he is to Sam and Dean. Like how Dean actually came to some self-awareness while facing the end. Like how Lilith doesn’t just possess children, she is actually child-like.

Like how Lilith has no power over Sam!

The TV Girl

Supernatural (7.5): You Can Make A Hell On Earth.

Tonight is the season finale of Supernatural. I am doing a few things to prepare. First, I am a posting some quick thoughts on the two previous episodes, which I apologize for not getting to sooner. Second, I am writing a note to myself reminding 7:30pm-me to wash off my make-up before tonight’s episode starts so that when I ball my eyes out I will not have mascara running down my face. Obviously, I do not think Dean is going to live.

I would rather see him go Hell than hear for one more second Sam advocating using science to gain immortality, which requires replacing worn body parts with new ones. These two recent episodes “Long Distance Call” and “Time Is On My Side” both addressed the issue of desperation: encountering the mystery of death and the prospect of eternal judgment our good sense disappears, and we behave against our best interest and our better nature. Dean almost killed an innocent man (and that innocent man almost killed Dean) because given a chance to speak to someone we have lost our grief will overcome our sense of right and wrong, or of even basic logic. After the silence of death we will listen to anything, even if it is encouragement to harm others or ourselves, or won’t be helpful to our current situation. Good thing Dean realized what he was doing, and Sam killed the evil thing, before Dean ventured too far into Hamlet-country. Sam’s quiet decent into at-any-cost mode might be even more frightening. How many lives would be exchanged to “give Dean more time” if Sam had gotten his way? Could Sam really have lived with himself if he had bargained with a butcher and asked Dean to be one as well? Sam’s reckless disregard for the implications of his proposal points out just how sad Dean’s prospects are.

But, bye bye Bella! Can’t say I am sorry to see you go, though I am thankful the scene cut to black and I didn’t have to see you getting torn apart by Hell Hounds. (My friend Calah thinks she may not be dead, but I respectfully disagree. If the producers are keeping her around, they better come up with something good to do with her, and not just doing Dean.) I am also thankful that the producers decided not to belabor the fact that Bella was sexually abused. Letting us know that tempers our response to her passing; reminding us both that evil actions rarely emerge from nothing, but also there should be some element of human empathy for others, no matter how repugnant we find them. But murder-as-consequence-of-molestation/rape is a worn out trope on TV (CSI anyone?), so I am glad that since it was employed it was done so quickly. Also, Bella not telling Sam and Dean why she made her deal evidenced the smallest amount of dignity on her part: she was willing to kill them to get out of her deal, but she did not make excuses for herself. Well done.

The little girl in black and white with the red eyes is officially the most disturbing thing ever to appear on this show. Oh yeah, and the ice cream scoop.

And finally, I just have to point out that I love being right: I mentioned the “Lilith has Dean’s contract” thing weeks ago. Maybe I am petty for taking pride in seeing something anyone could, but so be it.

The TV Girl

How I Met Your Mother (6): The Mystery Is Solved.

So Abbey (Britney Spears) was the woman badmouthing Barney all over town; it is always the one you never considered. Now that Barney has discovered this fact, slept with her again (and again), attempted to make Ted have an epiphany by pretending to be in a couple with her, fake proposing to her, and dumping her by redirecting her obsession towards Ted, I do not think we will be seeing Abbey again. Britney Spears does have the easy confidence of the regular HIMYM cast, but she was not too bad, especially during her bit with Barney. She displayed just the right amount of excessive-enthusiasm to make us believe she wouldn’t notice that the ring Barney gave her was made of candy.

And speaking of delusion, gay approval or not, Ted looked like the biggest tool in those red cowboy boots! There needs to be a new word for what Ted looked like. I kind of wish the patrons of the coffee shop had done more than scoff at his “pulling them off.” I wish they had pelted him with half-full paper cups, or banana-nut muffins. I haven’t seen feet so bright and ridiculous since I watched Sesame Street as a child, 20 years ago.

While personally Lily’s paintings also take me back to my childhood PBS days, I couldn’t be happier that she found an audience for her art. Producing two-dimensional dog pacifiers is much better than having to sell your wardrobe. And Marshall’s determination to support her even when it is not the most practical move makes him all the more endearing.

The TV Girl

Gossip Girl (7): Serena Deserves Better.

Dan is a moron.

There I said it, but I do not feel any better. I will try again.

Dan is an unbelievable moron.

For someone who spent so much time pining and longing for his dream girl, he turned away from her awfully easily. As she said, Dan put Serena up on a pedestal, so thinking she cheated on him, and knowing she has been keeping secrets, would be a difficult situation for him to process. But hooking up with Georgina is immensely hypocritical for a guy with such high standards. The fact that Georgina has been lying to him since he met her does not excuse him.

But really, Serena could not trust him anyway. She could not tell him what happened when Georgina’s “friend” overdosed and they both ran away. She told the people who own up to their own mistakes. Blair, Nate, and Chuck’s self-deprecating confessions (of already public sins) functioned as a perfect comic balance for Serena’s distraught evasiveness. The best of course was Chuck’s simple “I am Chuck Bass.” This kid cracks me up.

I am impressed by Serena’s “secret,” because when she started telling her story/Lilly started watching the video I expected a repeat of The O.C. Season Two finale when Marissa shot Trey, except that Serena would have been trying to fend off sexual assault. That was of course her reason for suggesting the coke, but in the end what happened was an accident. The distinctive circumstances of this storyline (Georgina’s culpability, Serena calling 911 and trying to save his life, the fact that she did not force anyone to do anything) have helped to different Gossip Girl from its creator’s previous show. That Serena has been suffering from circumstantial guilt rather than being genuinely responsible speeds up the resolution process, meaning that it is okay that her punishment was an exculpating conversation not actually shown.

Lilly’s improved parenting (you know actually listening to her child and helping her through a painful ordeal) completely merited a Rufus reunion reward. And since Dan is a moron, and Serena should not take him back anytime soon, there is no problem with Rufus and Lilly staying together. Yeah, I saw the preview too, and know that she is going to marry Bart (or at least it looks like she will), but a girl can hope, right?

By the way, Dan is a moron.

Oh, and Lisa Loeb. Totally sweet!

The TV Girl