One Tree Hill (5): I Have Been a Lousy Bridesmaid, But Haley…

I can genuinely say that I was not in any way expecting Haley to tell Lucas he should not marry Lindsey. I knew when she picked up the phone after finishing the last pages of Lucas’ new book that she was calling him and not Nathan, but I was prepared for something along the lines of “do you think I have made a mistake?” As viewers we have been given time to get to know Lindsey, so even though I do not want them to get married, because he is supposed to be with Peyton (and then we run the risk of a Dean/Rory cheating situation, which I have no interest in living though again), I think that Lucas and Lindsey as a couple are not too bad. If Lucas has really moved on, Lindsey is a decent choice. I am intrigued as to Haley’s reasoning for her proclamation.

Why does Haley seem so unconcerned with her own life? She is done trying to change Nathan? What does that really mean? Haley cannot be this defeated. Speaking for myself, it is not fair those of us who have supported them for so long. High five to Nathan for turning “Daddy is living on Uncle Lucas’ couch because he and Mommy are getting a divorce” into “Daddy is in a time out.” This is quality parenting people, take notes.

It might be wrong to point out unintentional hilarity, but I am still laughing this morning about Dan and his “date.” He told her he had a grandson, so the boundaries of age-appropriateness were already violated, but did he not look like he was just out of prison? (I have to refrain from full on mocking the facial-hair, as my bratty little soul wants to, because my oldest brother sported something very similar in a family portrait. It haunts me to this day.) Her “shocked” face should be an instructional video on YouTube: this is the slightly-constipated-like facial expression you make when you realize you just had sex with a sociopath.

Speaking of the less than talented, I would not be opposed to seeing little Chase (Steven Colletti) stick around. I am just not on board the whole Owen train. Call me a prude, but he just looks too old. It gives me a Rachel/Uncle Cooper flashbacks type of vibe.

As for Rachel, while I applaud Brooke’s heart, as a viewer I did not miss her, and do not care to see her return full time. She came in as a character to be the trampy troublemaker when Brook was growing out of that phase, but it just never really worked. Rachel never accomplished anything as a tramp (never managed to get the guy, whomever it was) and her whole self-loathing bit was way too mousey. Too bad she is a druggie, but Tree Hill is better off without her.

But, I did not realize until last night just how much I missed Lucas’ extremely pretentious voice-overs quoting the greats of literature (usually out of context). Always terrible, always amazing.

Tim and Bevin got married and had a baby? Random, very random.

All of this topsy-turvy-ness will be set to right in one week, when none other than Karen Roe returns. Oh how I have missed Moira.

The TV Girl